February 2018

February 19, 2018

Congratulations! You’re engaged! Now bring on the bombardment of preliminary questions. Like, 'Have you set a date yet?'

A cold sweat drapes your body as you feel inadequate, panicked, and already ages behind where you think you should be for this wedding stuff.

Stop it right there.

You aren’t behind; people are just nosy. You aren’t inadequate; people are overly curious. Ditch the panic and read on to help determine when you should get married.

DATES OR NUMBERS WITH MEANING

Think about numbers you like, ones that have meaning, that fall on an anniversary or a birthday or even a holiday. This can be fun, but I’m warning you not to be obsessed with it. Especially if your attachment to a number leads to analysis paralysis. The date is a vital detail for your wedding, and without it, planning can stall out and result in a permanent frustration face.

SEASON

What season do you want to get married in? If you got engaged on December 31st (yay for you) and you want to get married in the summer season (talking about the Northern hemisphere here), then you will have time to plan properly if you get married in late August. That’s only if you start to settle into a hustle pace or if you already know half your vendors are available (read the next section) and patiently awaiting you to inquire with them.

If you want a spring wedding, I would seriously rethink your strategy. If you have zero wedding experience, zero things lined up or decided on for this wedding you just said yes to having, 3-5 months is NOT enough time for you to live a life you’re going to like... and then get married at the peak of that hateful stress and overabundant overwhelm.

Stuck between two seasons? Think about the seasonal weather in the area you want to get married to help you narrow it down. Are you more terrified of the possibility of rain on your wedding day or oppressive heat? Reference the Farmer’s Almanac for a minute amount of confidence boosting.

AVAILABILITY

Likely you and your fiance aren’t going to pick a date where one of you is not available (however, military couples have this dilemma and require extra flexibility with availability), but what if you are set on a date and a venue, and the venue is not available? Or a photographer, a planner, an officiant?

Before you dig your feet in for 8/18/18 - make sure that the other must-haves of your wedding are available. Especially if they make it in your top five must-haves. If they aren’t available, then you must have a second date lined up.

CONVENIENCE

There are many convenience factors which play when selecting a date, both for yourself and for your guests. Do you have guests traveling from far and wide? If so, think about a date that would be most convenient for them. Airfare spikes during the holidays, so consider the expenses that will go into reaching your wedding like transportation.

Are you picking a date that will be inconvenient for your guests because other family related events are happening near or on that date? Like other weddings, births or family vacations? Perhaps give those big life events or vacation a bit of breathing room.

Since you’re newly engaged, shouldn’t you give yourself a little bit of breathing room? Like if you just got engaged on December 31st (again, yay for you), it’s likely an inconvenience to plan your wedding for April, or May, or anything with less than eight months to get your shit together. That includes taking engagement pictures to go in your save the dates and booking vendors. In the upper midwest, where seasonal weather favors summer weddings, this might mean giving yourself a year plus to plan, and I have to admit, that’s a really great idea.

Just remember that the biggest complaint couples with short engagements have is that they felt rushed, cramped and like they didn’t even have the time to enjoy being engaged. I want you to be happily married, but I also want you to be happily engaged.

Prosperity, Love & Happiness,

Josey

February 16, 2018

Weddings are expensive and there’s no way around it. If you want guests at your wedding, you want to wear a dress and you want a bridal party there, then, it’s going to cost money. If you want to feed your guests, make your wedding legal with a marriage license, and have flowers, then, it’s going to cost money.

Want to have a wedding for free? It is possible, all thanks to Fab! Weddings, but you’ve got to act quick, click here to enter.

You could win a complete $22,000 Fab! Wedding at Glenhaven Events in Farmington, Minnesota. Invite up to 150 guests for an April 20th, 2019 wedding. All you have to do? Tell us what makes you fabulous! That’s all you have to do in order to win a complete wedding, including:

  • Venue: banquet hall and wedding garden: 9AM - Midnight
  • Wedding reception and dinner at Glenhaven Events (1595 220th Street East, Farmington, MN, 55024)
  • Wedding ceremony with officiant from Fab! Weddings
  • Linens & centerpieces from Glenhaven Events
  • DJ & dance from Trustworthy Music DJ
  • Cash bar, no minimum purchase required
  • Italian-style dinner buffet from Rudy's Redeye Grill - Rosemount
  • 8” wedding cake + sheet cake for guests from Farmington Bakery
  • 3 hours of professional photography from FabWeddingsMN.com
  • Simple & Sweet video package from Summit Hill Studios
  • Flowers for the bride and groom from Rosemount Floral
  • Fire truck party bus shuttle from area hotel to/from the venue
  • Bridal suite at the Grandstay Hotel & Conference Apple Valley
  • Beauty salon, groom's room, and gaming arcade rental for the morning
  • Photo booth

Head to the Glenhaven Facebook page to enter, be sure to read the rules because the more support you get from friends and family the more you can increase your chance to win! Quick, you have until March 15th, 2018!

February 12, 2018

Don’t lose sight of why your getting married.

It’s literally the number one advice that like all well-seasoned wedding vendors will give you. Why? Because we see it all the time. We see you get wrapped up in the table runners and the matching groomsmen socks, the signature cocktail garnishes, and the mason jar mugs. And while all of those things are great and are going to enhance your wedding day, the one thing you cannot do without is the “why” of your wedding. You are getting married because [FILL IN BLANK].

I can guarantee that blank is not ‘because I really like spending tens of thousands of dollars on one party,’ or ‘because I really want an excuse to try out hand lettering.’ No, your blank is something much more tender and personal, something like ‘because I found my best friend and I want to marry her,’ or ‘because I want to celebrate our love.’

So focus on that, return to your why when things get stressed and when your to-do list seems insurmountable. Certainly having help, helps. So, let’s move right along to another big mistake couples make.

Going it alone.

I by no means am doubting your abilities or assuming the worst of you. However, ask anyone who is just married, and they will tell you one of two things. Either, ‘we are so happy we hired a wedding planner. We weren’t sure if we’d need one, but she was invaluable.’ Or, ‘we should have had a day-of coordinator because I ended up doing so much, my mom was racing around, and my sister is still mad at me for having to do all the stuff. Hiring a wedding planner would have been so helpful.’

Take that hindsight and avoid messing up big time. I know it seems like just another added expense but think about the difference in experience from when you host a dinner party to when you go to a dinner party. When you host there is a ton of prep work, you have to greet guests, take coats, make small talk, orient everyone on where to go and when, on top of the meal prep, refilling drinks and not to mention the cleanup. When you go to a dinner party you are completely taken care of, there might be a moment or two when you pitch in with pouring wine or passing out napkins, but overall you are free to enjoy yourself.

Your wedding is like that. You’ll be the one at the reins planning and preparing. Shouldn’t you relinquish a little bit of stress and control and let a professional execute your wedding? So you don’t have to worry about being on time or where Uncle Freddy is for family photos, or lining up the wedding party for your processional or cueing dinner service. You can just get married and focus on that why, because you want to celebrate your love.

I see it time and time again, that brides and grooms don’t quite feel the value of having help on the day of their wedding from a wedding planner. They’ve been lulled into a sense of security by their venue or by their restrictive budget, that their current plan is a good plan.

And then the panic of 1 month to go sets in, and they call me.

There is just so much for a wedding, so much planning, so much to think about, so much to prepare for. Take my advice (and the hindsight of couples everywhere) and hire a wedding planner, at the very least for the day of your wedding. That way you can just focus on your why and on having the most fun day ever.

Prosperity, Love & Happiness,

Josey

February 5, 2018

Procrastination should be warded away from your wedding planning process like the plague, but if it does rear its ugly head, keep in mind, these 11 last minute wedding details, should not be saved until the last minute, or day, or week.

  1. Music playlist.
    If you are dictating to your professional DJ which songs to play when (not advisable), saving the playlist until last minute comes naturally. So does staying up until 4AM ensuring that you’ve created a song list of all your current favorite songs. Instead of cramming like it’s a pre-calculus quarter-final, start a list and tack it to the fridge. Add songs as you think of them throughout your engagement. Then three weeks out from your wedding day, sit down and flush out the list, as in fill in the gaps to ensure you’ve selected enough songs.
  2. Slideshow.
    Opting to play a soundless slideshow on loop during cocktail hour can be a great way for guests to be entertained and to get a better sense of you as a couple. Opting to save the slideshow for the week of your wedding can be a great way to raise your blood pressure and then ditch the slideshow last minute. Put it on your calendar, collect images, ask for help from your bridal party, and put that sucker together soon, rather than later.
  3. Confirming the room layout.
    Do not save this for the night before your wedding. Confirm the final layout in the last month before your wedding. If you are going crazy with unreturned RSVPs, leave room at tables for those latecomers, or leave an extra table for just in case. If you are assigning guests to seats or tables, just tell yourself, ‘if they can’t RSVP on time, then they can’t be bummed that they’re sitting at a table with strangers.’ That’s the way the cookie crumbles.
  4. Ceremony Music.
    Besides the music playlist, you will need to select a song for your processional (walking down the aisle at the begging of the ceremony) and for your recessional (walking back up the aisle at the end of the ceremony). These songs are impactful and can yield a lot of meaning, select them when you select your officiant, so you aren’t stuck with a last minute decision to pick something totally generic and completely meaningless to you as a couple.
  5. Program assembly.
    Seeeeriously. You can get a head start on the programs by collecting information required for them as soon as you ask your bridal party to be your bridal party. Keep an ongoing list of information needed for the programs - ceremony time and location, reception time and location, wedding party members, ceremony structure - and create a rough draft when you create invitations. Then you’ll be halfway to completion, and you won’t have to save the whole thing for last minute.
  6. Ceremony.
    Saving the ceremony for last minute will always happen when you don’t hire a professional officiant. And that’s okay, to not hire a professional officiant, but be prepared to actually plan your ceremony. To sit down and look up typical formats and to write out who says what when. Your officiant is likely waiting on you to do this, so don’t let it be the other way around.
  7. Alphabetizing escort cards.
    Such a mindless and easy task that can be accomplished while watching Netflix. Do it and don’t wait until the day of your wedding for someone else to spend an hour alphabetizing and creasing the folds.
  8. Final dress fitting.
    Remember it takes time to sew, but also be mindful that the later you inquire, the more booked a seamstress will be. I also recommend just giving an alteration company a heads up about your impending order, so they save room for you in their busy schedule.
  9. Haircuts or colors.
    Please. Don’t mess with your do the week of your wedding. Most stylists will recommend the last cut and color be 4-6 weeks before the wedding, and I think we should all take their advice.
  10. Decor additions.
    Picking up last minute decor and purchasing a few more details won’t enhance your wedding. Usually, those details don’t even get used, so they just become drains to your bank account. Don’t add last minute decor details.
  11. An inclement weather plan.
    Don’t start talking about it too late, have a well thought out plan, so your option B is just as good as option A. You might not need the plan, but you might.

Good luck wedding planning and good luck staving off procrastination! Do you know someone who is great at leaving things to the last minute? Share this post with them using the links below.

Prosperity, Love & Happiness,
Josey

February 1, 2018

I got married back when Facebook was for college students, so I don’t really have the same intuitive understanding of selfies that you do. You should 100% be taking advantage of social media and here’s how.

  1. Wedding hashtag for social media image sharing.
    This is a no-brainer. Have a wedding hashtag to allow for friends to share your photos. This is a great way to start your day-after-the-wedding morning, using the hashtag to look at the fun moments of the night that other people had at your wedding.
  2. Snapchat filter.
    Design a geofilter that guests can use to share their snaps and to spread the word that you’re married and people had fun watching you do it.
  3. Facebook live for extended family.
    Is there more than one person who can’t make the wedding ceremony? Live stream on Facebook so they can watch you get married from their hospital bed or home. Just make sure you have good internet at the ceremony site
  4. Tag people in posts for RSVP reminders.
    Do this more; I think it will work. Snap a picture of returned RSVPs and then use the caption: “So many people have RSVPed, and we are getting so excited for the big day!” Then tag people who have yet to RSVP. Guilt is a wonderful tool.
  5. Post your engagement ring photo.
    Want to revel in your newly engaged excitement? Post a snap of your ring and let the double taps roll in.
  6. Search for inspiration - not just on Pinterest.
    Pinterest is a great tool for inspiration but so is Instagram. Search or follow hashtags that represent what you want your wedding to look or feel like. Some of my favorite? #mnbride or #mnweddingplanner or #rusticwedding
  7. Use help groups to get specific planning help.
    Facebook groups can offer a lot of support and personalized planning tips. Search for local groups and then read the comments to ensure the vibe of the group fits your personality.
  8. Find free planning apps and wedding podcasts with hashtag searches.
    Again, use hashtags like you would google, ones like #weddingpodcast or #weddingtools or #weddingfair can yield fabulous results.
  9. Buy wedding items on discount using Facebook Marketplace.
    These days it’s easy to find the decor and details you want for your wedding on discount from brides who’ve already used them at their wedding. I would go as far as buying used candles - because once they’re lit, you won’t be able to tell a difference. Plus pre-lit wicks are easier to light.
  10. Help visualize your vision.
    Following your wedding vendors can really help flood your brain with inspirational images and solidify your design ideas. Don’t be afraid, however, to shut down from social media every so often, so you don’t get lost in the comparison game.

How are you going to use social media for your wedding?

Prosperity, Love & Happiness,
Josey

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